All the same

Published 12:00 am Thursday, January 29, 2004

You’ve heard it many times -&uot;they’re all the same&uot; or &uot;they’re all alike.&uot; I clicked on my TV set. What would it be like to truly be the same in every aspect? Stay with me while I take you on a wild ride of sameness. I’m selecting categories and showing you a new world. May even take you back from it. Hang on!

Let’s set the atmosphere so you’ll know the ground rules. Everything will be the same – color looks, things, places, people, clothing, habits. If I left anything out put in yourself. Here we go.

Color – There is no color. Think in terms of a dull gray. That’s it. Nothing more. You are all dressed in this color. No exceptions. No person or occasion can change it. Sexy? Wow! Guys should fight to get to you. Just remember they are grays, too.


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Looks – We all look alike. Forget mirrors You’ll hate them.

Homes – Exact. Every bit of furniture from one house to another is the same. Wander into the wrong house – no problem. All is familiar. You can change husbands and children. You won’t even be aware.

How about our military? Won’t leave them out. Guess I’ll tackle the Navy since I had four brothers (who didn’t look alike) in the Navy. Let’s put them on a big naval vessel – radar, guns, cannons and a crew of brave sailors who look alike. I’m sending them overseas to countries that don’t like us. Our ship and theirs meet on a high sea. They salute each other, visit from ship to ship. Fire a round for a greeting and both go on their way – much waving and shouting. No differences in the personnel, the ship or even the flag of each. Poor Navy! But take the Army. Marching looking at the next man you see yourself! You shoot at the enemy you’re shooting yourself. Your superiors are you. All the armies in the world look like you, dress like you. (Remember the dull gray?) Boring, boring, boring!

Marriage – Forget divorce. You’ll wind up with the same.

School – Teachers and kids all look alike. How do you scold your double when they misbehave? Can’t have any difference between smart and dumb kids. Hope the teachers are highly paid. As this will be the dullest of dull!

Go to the movies and see yourself on stage and screen. Not worth the price charged.

Have I reached you yet as to the most boring world? Have I gotten across to you that you think twice before ever saying,

&uot;I wish I were like…?&uot; Not me. Faults, and I have many, I don’t wish I were like anyone. So take me as you find me or leave me alone.

One last thought. If all are alike in looks, dress, homes, brains, how about God? Does He have to fit the mold? Dare we even say it? Don’t think I’d want God to look like me or reverse it – make it I Look like God. I just got away with murder with that statement. I don’t want to hear from anyone telling me I’m heading towards hell. Write your own story. This is mine. I’m 87, I’m allowed.

Florence Arena is a resident of Hillcrest Retirement Center and a regular News-Herald columnist.