By Ariane Williams

Bitterness can become a dangerous wildfire in your spirit. Out of control. Spreads rapidly. Dangerous. What is your bitterness anchored in during this journey? Are you going to allow bitterness around you to uproot your assignment? You cannot allow the enemy to shift your assignment because you are stuck in the mud of bitterness. There is healing in forgiveness if your heart wants to be free.

Last year, one of my closest friends passed away. We argued about the craziest things, and we even stopped talking once (only for a little while). Our silence never lasted long, because one of us would do something that would break the ice. During the last stages of her journey, we learned to truly love and forgive.

I remember the day that she called me and said, “We have a problem.” I pulled over, thinking that something was wrong and that is when she told me that we had not argued in six months and that I needed to find something to argue with her about. She told me that I got on her nerves, but she loved me and that she would always love me because she “knew” who I was in her heart. You must know the intent of the heart. She also told me that I could not use big words at her funeral if I had to speak. She always thought that when we got into arguments that I would use “big” words, so she would go and look them up in the dictionary.

It has been a year since she has been gone, and we are still arguing. I am glad that we both had endured the healing in forgiveness. It made our relationship stronger. At the end of her journey, none of those arguments mattered to me. The personal talks, holding her hand during chemotherapy, laying beside her in the bed laughing. Oh, and the last time she called me to bring her some Krispy Kreme doughnuts. That was the last time that I saw her and held her with my eyes. We learned how to grow in maturity during our journey in friendship.

Do not allow an open wound of bitterness to get deeper without changing the bandages. We must learn to laugh at anger, because laughter confuses the enemy and brings us closer to maturity and transforms us into love. Forgiveness heals the wound of bitterness and allows us to breathe. When you have done all that you can to forgive, and there is not a “mutual forgiveness,” let it go. Do not expect others to walk in the same “faith of forgiveness” as you, as they are still growing in their healing. They are dealing with a much deeper hurt. Do not allow a disagreement to cost you an agreement to live in freedom and faith. There will be a time when we must put our gloves on together and fight the enemy together. We must know the intent of the heart and not be led by emotions. Negative emotions can lead to deeper wounds of hate, resentment, revenge and a venom of destruction if you cannot forgive.

Do not get stuck in the mud of past mistakes; it is time to move forward. Stand firm in your right place of forgiveness. Speak positivity into the atmosphere and silence the voice of disaster, confusion and anger. Be the light of forgiveness and allow others to see the change in you. Never seek revenge, seek ultimate love. Have compassion for those who cannot stand with you or hear your heart in truth. Bitterness is like a sour lemon. Do not allow the bitterness to make you pucker. Release your hurt in this season and learn to forgive. Write a letter to “Forgiveness” and tell forgiveness what is on your heart and allow the healing to begin. Go back and mend those broken relationships and watch the hand of God move around you. Do not allow others to judge the writing on your wall if they do not know what is on the other side.

Ariane Williams is a teacher, minister, published author and liturgical dancer. Email her at arianewilliams810@yahoo.com.