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March 19 marked 20 years since Suffolk Police Officer William Andrew “Drew” Henley died in the line of duty. His friends and family continue to be impacted by his death, and his mark on Suffolk continues to leave a lasting impact.

On March 19, 2005, Henley died from a heart attack after pursuing a wanted suspect on foot. After taking the suspect into custody, Henley collapsed from a heart attack and was taken to Sentara Obici Hospital.

Henley was also a U.S. Marine Corps veteran and an SPD officer for three years. He aspired to become a Florida State Highway Patrol Officer. 

“You think … that people move on and people forget,” Henley’s wife, Chrissy, said. “They don’t forget. When someone leaves such a mark on your life, you don’t forget them, ever.”

Chrissy and Henley were together for five years but married for a year and a half when he died.

“We had everything,” she said. “We had a great life. We were happily married.”

Henley is also survived by his four kids, the oldest being around 11 or 12 when he died.

It’s clear Henley touched the lives of many based on the over 600 reflections left on his Officer Down memorial page by friends, family, colleagues, and even strangers offering kind words.

The most recent reflection left on March 19 simply reads, “Haven’t forgotten you, my friend,” from Detective David Simmons, who formerly worked with SPD.

Chrissy said it’s amazing and touching to know that so many people still remember Henley and that he hasn’t been forgotten.

John McCarley, SPD deputy chief of operations, met Henley while waiting to go through the public safety academy and quickly became very close friends. Their families were also close, and McCarley said they started doing everything together.

“He was a really good friend at that time,” he said. “I didn’t know that we would get any closer, but later, he was like a brother to me.”

McCarley credits a lot of his success in the academy to Henley, he said, because Henley was always motivating him to do better.

One of his most heartbreaking memories in the police department was when he found out about Henley’s death.

McCarley said he was on his way home when he heard about Henley’s foot pursuit.

“It just didn’t quite sound right,” he said.

He headed back to the scene, where he saw another officer bent over, crying. At this point, McCarley still didn’t know the gravity of the situation, and he was asked to question the suspect Henley had detained.

“They bring the gentleman back, and one of the first things he said to me, he said, ‘What happened? What happened to that officer? Did he die?’ So I kind of knew at that point that he had no intention, or didn’t know what was going on, or didn’t try to do anything to the officer,” McCarley said. “He wasn’t angry, he was more scared than anything that something happened to the officer.”

Later that evening, McCarley went to Henley’s house to be with Chrissy. He said they didn’t talk much; they just sat together and cried.

“We just couldn’t fathom it,” he said. “We couldn’t believe it. That was, that was rough. I’m glad that I didn’t have to tell her, but I was kind of upset that I wasn’t the first one to tell her at the same time.”

Chrissy said it’s “hard to put into words” how she felt that day 20 years ago. She said she realized pretty quickly that he was a very happy person and he would not have wanted them to spend days crying over him.

Chrissy doesn’t think Henley had any regrets when he died; she believes he was “perfectly content in every way.”

Between McCarley and Chrissy, Henley was described as a good cop, a wonderful father and husband, and a humble, kind and funny man who loved his job and was never unkind to anyone.

“He was an extraordinary person, both as an officer and as a person,” McCarley said. “I’ve never seen him be mean to anybody, it just wasn’t in his character, and he loved his kids like nobody’s business. It was a hard loss.”

The passing of a loved one is never something you truly get over, Chrissy said. 

She said she felt relieved after being able to get through one whole year without him, but there are always milestones happening that he isn’t around for. He’s missed all his children’s weddings and the birth of his grandchildren.

Chrissy reflected on the first time she felt real joy about five or six years after Henley died.

“For me, that was a milestone, to be able to feel joy,” she said. “I remember faking it for a lot of years, pretending to be happy, pretending for somebody else, you know, and it was such a strange feeling to all of a sudden feel joy, real joy.”

The grief she went through and continues to deal with is interesting, Chrissy said. People don’t question the grieving process if a sibling, parent, or child passes away.

“When you lose a spouse, people think you’re supposed to move on,” she said. “People think you’re supposed to get over it. Why do I have to get over that? It’s part of my life. It’s part of my children’s life. It’s never going to go away.”

McCarley said it feels like one day has passed instead of 20 years since Henley died. He has photos of himself and Henley around his office and he always thinks about him when making hard decisions. 

If he could say anything to Henley, McCarley said he would ask him, “Where you been, brotha?”

Chrissy said this is something she and her kids will carry with them forever, but they try to remember Henley with smiles on their faces rather than tears in their eyes.

“You don’t move on, you don’t get over it, and you just live your best life, and you know that he’s always a part of it,” she said. “And it’s not sad every day. We’re not sad. We’re very happy people. We enjoy our lives, and we’re very blessed with what we have, but we recognize that there’s a little piece missing.”