Q&A with Dr. Carletta Perry — Fitting in

Published 8:36 pm Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Q. I don’t seem to fit in. I just feel like a nobody — and I’m sorry this isn’t a question.

A. First of all, you are somebody! Some people’s underestimation of us is where our greatness lies.

You are great because you are different. You are great because you are creative. You are great because you don’t think like everyone else. You are great because you are simply you! I’d rather be an original me than a copy of someone else any day.

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Who said you needed to fit in? If you ask me — and you did — fitting in is really overrated, so let’s celebrate you.

Sometimes being in the wrong place around the wrong people, trying to fit in, can be depressing, because you don’t fit. Oh what a joy it is when you are around people who enjoy doing what you enjoy, love talking about what you enjoy talking about and fill your life with happy moments. You just fit, right?

I really want you to I want you to work on finding your purpose and your passion and doing more of what you enjoy. Sometimes, the things we think we need, we don’t need. Sometimes, the people we think we need, we don’t need.

Sometimes, we think we must stay on that job, but remember that doing so is a choice when there are so many great opportunities in the workforce.

Did you work hard to get the guy/the girl, the career, or the lifestyle, and it’s not what you thought? Sometimes in life, we can be sidetracked by what we believe we should be striving for and lose sight of truly living and enjoying some really beautiful moments along the way.

Money does not lead to true happiness. People will not always make you happy. In fact, you may not be pleased with yourself at times, but you can change that by owning your thoughts and choices and living a life of character and little regret.

One more thing — and I ask that you do this for me until you can do it for you: Every day, make a difference in the life of someone else. It can be a kind word, a gesture, helpful advice, or simply being the best you can be so others around you see what a real everyday hero looks like.

Heroes don’t fit in; they stand out.

Dr. Carletta N. Perry is a professor of psychology, a therapeutic life coach and relationship expert, as well as author, radio and television host and entrepreneur. Catch her new television show, “It’s Life Changing with Dr. Carletta Perry,” Sundays at 7 p.m. on Charter channel 191 and on YouTube. Email your own questions for her to contact@drcarlettaperry.com.