It’s not you; it’s me

Published 8:53 pm Saturday, December 9, 2017

It’s over. I’m sorry to be so blunt about it, but I’ve learned that it’s better to be direct with people than to risk awkward miscommunications. So let me be direct: I’m leaving.

I’ve learned to never say never, so I won’t tell you I’ll never be back, but I will say that this feels to me like the beginning of a permanent separation.

Rest assured: It’s not you; it’s me.

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In fact, you’ve done everything right. You’ve been there to support me. You’ve encouraged me when I felt overwhelmed. You’ve chastised me when I needed to be brought around. You’ve expected my best and — more often than I’d like to admit — graciously settled for less. You’ve loved and laughed and shared with me for all these years. You’ve listened to all my opinions (and I’ve got a lot of ‘em), and even when we didn’t agree, you gave me the benefit of the doubt.

You’ve been a great partner.

But things have changed for me.

Lately I find myself wondering about what might have been — and about what could be. Lately I’ve been thinking that God has something different and unexpected in His plan for me. Don’t get me wrong: I know He put us together for a reason, but I just think He’s telling me that it’s time to move on.

So, yeah, I’m leaving town for a while, and I’m going back to school, and I know you’ll just move on with your life, and that’s pretty much what we both have to do, after all. I mean, what else CAN we do, right?

Just know that this is going to hurt me more than it hurts you. So many memories. So many good times. I’ve kept all the old photos, and after a while — once I’m not feeling quite so raw about the whole thing — I’ll look at them from time to time to remind me about what we shared.

You can keep up with me, too, if you like. I’ll keep my blog up to date at, and there’s always Facebook, of course.

So, goodbye. That’s it. I’m outta here. Thanks for the memories. Good night and good news.

— 30 —

Nine years and a couple of thousand opinions after taking his seat in the fishbowl office off the newsroom at the Suffolk News-Herald, Res Spears is closing the books on a newspaper career that spanned most of the past 32 years. Email him at