Need an election issue?

Published 12:00 am Sunday, February 8, 2004

You can check on this but are you aware that the members of Congress do not pay into our Social Security plan? You see; our plan is not suitable for persons of such high rank so they have a very special plan for themselves that was created many years ago…by them. And there is a good reason for them not to change one whisker of it. Basically it works like this, when they retire they continue to draw the same pay for life, except it may increase from time to time for cost of living adjustments.

I won’t go into the nit-gnats of the plan but Senator Byrd and Congressman White, and their wives, may expect to draw just under eight million dollars, based on their life expectancy, and their widows, about

$250,000 to the end of their lives. Younger dignitaries who retire at an early age will do even better. So what is their cost for this plum? Nada, nothing, we pick up the tab for this plan via the General Funds. &uot;Our tax dollars at work.&uot;

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We, the lesser, after years of paying into our Social Security plan, matched by our employer, under current investment &uot;strategy&uot; could net us as much as an average of $1200 per month. Try it this way. If you drew $1000 per month, starting at retirement, you would have to live an additional 68 years and one month to equal Senator Bill Bradley’s benefits. So what’s the solution to our meager by comparison retirement wage? One bit of help would be to jerk the Golden Fleece retirement plan from under the Senators and Congressmen and women and let them join us in ours. I dare you to dare your favorite Senator to reveal what he/she expects to draw annually from their plan. Our Social Security is already in deep doodoo because there is not enough young workers paying onto the pot to maintain the benefits us old folks draw out now. So how many workers does it take to support Congressional &uot;pension&uot; benefits?

Ask your Senator..

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My last word on the &uot;merge with the east&uot; attempt is that those cities should adopt the &uot;China Reduction Theory.&uot; In order to ease up the congestion in schools and on high-ways do what they did in China. Pass a law that no family may have more than one child. Later, a few generations from now when citizens will wonder where everyone went, the law can then allow two children. That will maintain the then status quo.

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Million of kids started high school last fall and if they get by the next four SOL tests will become known as the Class of 2007. Many will go on to colleges in the fall of that year. Now I am from the class of 1943 so you know there have been many changes in this world during the period between the two groups. The following is what college heads will tell the teachers and professors of that year to prepare them for the mental attitudes of the incoming class of 2007.

They were born in 1985 and have no meaningful recollection of the Reagan era and probably don’t know that he had ever been shot, but think Clinton was cool. They were prepubescent when the Persian Gulf War was waged. They were ten years old when the Soviet Union broke apart and do not remember the Cold War. They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up. Tiananmen Square means nothing to them and bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic. They don’t know what you mean when you say, &uot;You sound like a broken record,&uot; the Compact disc was introduced when they were one year old. But they’ve always had an answering machine.

Most have never seen a black and white TV. They have always had cable and there have always been VCRs, but they can’t fathom not having a remote control. In their lives Michael Jackson has always been white, Jaws are old movies, the Vietnam War is ancient history, and they haven’t the faintest idea how to use a typewriter. Sadly, too many of them will end up in liberal colleges, knowing everything about sex, and denigrating almost everything that is still good in America… while listening to rap crap. Now tell me, which political party will they wrap themselves in?

Robert Pocklington is a resident of Suffolk and a regular News-Herald columnist. He can be contacted via e-mail at