With the nuns, Part II
Published 12:00 am Friday, September 3, 2004
I left you with the nun dying and going to heaven with God waiting with a slinky black dress complete with jewels – all the things the nuns never had now. Sister Michael and Sister Matthew could handle all this glamour. They were young and pretty. They could even end up with boyfriends up there. They’d have to change clothes at that famous gate though. Can’t attract anything in the habit. Would God let them have fun there since He took it away on earth? I guess He would. He understands. I sure hope the nuns meet some nice guys – the young ones. Now, Sr. Mary Joseph is old and fat. She wobbles as she walks. She’s cranky so I guess no boyfriend for her up there.
On time Mother (mine) gave Sr. Michael hankies for Christmas. I sneaked in a lacy one when Mother went for ribbon. I watched Sister as she counted the hankies. When she came to the lacy one she stopped, put her hand to her cheek and smiles. She can use it in heaven as rules will be different.
I was getting into higher grades now and Dad seems to be changing his mind about public schools for me. I am so sweet it’s positively sickening. I want so badly for it to happen. You have never seen chores done so quickly or so perfectly. What an angel. Dad noticed. One day he remarked, &uot;If public school is worth such perfection, we’d better get you there or consider canonization and I doubt a saint in this house would last long.&uot;
Miracle of miracles, I made it. Permission to go to public school was granted. I now know how a prisoner feels being told he wouldn’t be getting the electric chair. (Lethal injection these days, but I’m an old-fashioned girl.) Having already completed the courses I needed for senior year in parochial school, I could only ace it in public school. I never needed a book and I was now targeted as real smart. How’s that for pulling the wool over everyone’s eyes? I always wanted to say that because it’s so silly.
I’m a big girl. I’m a senior and being a new female the boys flocked in my direction. Could heaven be better? I doubt it. The next move is college. I’ll give you that next. I’d shout ‘halleluia’ if I knew how to spell it.
Note: Last week’s column inadvertently identified Dr. Desmond John Longford as Dr. Desmond John Longfold. I regret the error.
Florence Arena is a regular News-Herald columnist.