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Disarmed at the polls

I hope you voted this morning. I did. I tried to convince my wife to go with me, but she was not interested in going with me at that early hour.

I did my best to persuade her, telling her that there were dark forces on the ballot and, quoting Edmund Burke, told her, &uot;All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.&uot;

That did not seem to influence her so I quoted John Belushi to her from an approximately 1976 Saturday Night Live Weekend Update commentary appearance in which he said, “In Amsterdam 95 percent of the people vote and they smoke hash in the street.”

She was still unmoved. I’m hoping that she’ll be able to get herself together and make it to the polls before day’s end. I hope you do, too.

I enjoy teasing people a little and was planning on having some fun with the folks working the polls at the Crittenden-Eclipse-Hobson Ruritan house. I had one the same thing last fall when voting for governor.

Suffolk, as you likely know, utilizes those electronic Diebold machines that leave no paper trail, the very ones many contend can be easily tampered with. In the 2004 presidential election, there were reports all over of Ohio of people who said they cast a ballot for Kerry but when they pulled the lever, or whatever, it registered as a vote for Bush.

The head of the Diebold company was among the leaders of the Bush re-election effort in Ohio and was quoted as saying he would do everything possible to make sure Bush won the state. Some think that included tampering with the programming on the computerized voting machines.

I mentioned this concern to Voter Registrar Patsy Parker once and she called me a nut or something like that.

That may be, but it’s beside the point. Anyway, when I went to vote for governor last year, before going into the booth, I asked the little old ladies working the polls if I would receive a receipt or anything showing who I voted for. They said no.

“Well how do I know my vote’s not going to be switched?” I demanded. “I don’t want my vote being counted for that #$^%#* Kilgore.”

I planned on doing the same thing this morning, but before I could, one of the charming ladies there disarmed me by complimenting me on my tie. I told her I’ve had more compliments on this tie than anything I’ve ever owned and that I bought it about 10 years ago from Peebles Department Store in Summersville, W.Va. for 9 bucks, which is true.

Anyway, she was so nice, I just couldn’t bring myself to rattle her cage.

Please go vote today. It’s important.